I’ve been thinking and writing about privacy this last several weeks. Things like kids’ right to privacy and privacy rules in families. How much privacy to preschoolers need? Tweens? Teens? The rules seem to change as children age and, of course, from family to family.

One thing I just remembered is that we parents have a right to privacy too! Often, parents will ask me about what to say if their kid asks them “how old were you when you had sex for the first time?” The answer involves values, personal comfort level and privacy.

As a parent, you have the right to privacy about your sex life – past, present and future. You don’t have to reveal your sexual history to your children. One thing to keep in mind is that the most important thing to your child is themselves. That is to say, they are very concerned about what is right for them, what’s going to happen to them, when will it be okay for them to have sex.

They want to know about our history so they can use it as a way to make a decision about their future. It’s fine to answer honestly and tell them about it