I've just released a new module (fanfare) which seems to work pretty well. I have a couple of silly bug fixes to put up tonight (knew I should've called it "beta") but other than that it works great. It's called Node Reference Variables:

http://drupal.org/project/nodereference_variables

All it does is present a load of stuff (depending on other contrib modules installed and some admin options) via the hook_preprocess_node() preprocess hook for themers to use to do cool theming stuff with Node Reference CCK fields. Main feature I'm using is the jQuery UI tabs it provides.

read more